I promised Jack I’d draw him flowers every Valentine’s day. I can’t give him real flowers, but he really likes it when I do this ;w; 

Done with watercolor pencils and some acrilics.

tagged twice so here we go
  • Would you rather live in the mountains or by the beach?
I like the sea better ;w; So, by the beach.
  • Tell me about your mother.
She’s kind and means well but she’s a little lonely. I wish I could do more for her, she’s done so much for me.
  • If you had to choose between being ONLY kissed or ONLY hugged by your significant other, what would you pick?
Hugged ;w; I’ve lived without kissing my 23 years, I can go by without them, but not without hugs ;__;
  • What’s your earliest memory?
Learning how to take off my underwear shirt, standing on my bed, as my mom readied the bathroom for me to get a shower. I was younger than 4 years old.
  • What do you think happens to you after you die?
Reincarnation. That’s what I want to believe in.
  • What’s your favourite tv show (both animated and filmed)?
"Avatar: The Last Airbender" and "Friends".
  • What are you wearing right now?
A black commando top and my panties. It’s hot.
  • If you could be anything you wanted for an entire week, what would you choose?
I would be David Tennant and play with my own hair and chest and butt and I’d run in front of mirrors a lot. I’d spend my days trying on clothes and taking pictures of myself and running into fans on purpose. I’d borrow a sonic screwdriver and play pranks on Whovians.
  • What do you like about yourself the most? 
My brains. I’m nowhere near the smartest person in the planet, but I like how I carry myself…
  • What’s the last book you read?
I’m still reading “Into The Wild” ;w;
  • Summer or winter? Why?
Winter, because heat sucks, and cold allows all kinds of nice things, like cotton and wool and fleece clothings, and hot beverages, and cuddles. 
  • Who’s your best friend & how long have you known them?
Jesu is, and we’ve known each other since 5th grade, so 14 years!
  • If you had a million dollars would you buy me a house (if not, what would you do with the money)?
I would help you build your house ;w;
  • Did you realize what I was referencing in that last question?
Probably not, sorry xD;
  • If you could see any band/singer perform live (including anyone who’s disbanded/died), who would you want to see?  Who would you take with you to the show?
Coldplay ;wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww; freaking Coldplay… and I’d take you with me ;wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww;
  • What’s your favourite flavour of ice cream?
  • How many languages do you speak?  What are they?  Do you wish you knew more (if so, which others would you want to learn)?
I know Spanish and English and a tiny bit of Latin. I wish I were a more applied student to have learned more Latin… And I would like to learn German.
  • Do you prefer sweet or plain cereal?
  • If you could share your next meal with anyone in the world, who would you pick?
  • Would you read a book written by me (Jack)?
  • What are your feelings on cheese?
I like it, odd question xDDDDD
  • Who would you cast as yourself in the biographical movie of your life?

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… Alexis Bledel V: Totes not like me but I goddamn love her.

I don’t feel like tagging anyone, so yeah. Sorry.

Day 1: Favourite male character


Well, any of you who’ve been hanging around here long enough know pretty damn well that Faust is my favourite character. That’s clear enough.

I think that (even just going from the basics of his character’s history) he had a whole freaking lot of potential. Honestly, I appreciate it when an author specifically points out the fact that they’ve written a Faustian character — it forces the reader to get a grip on at least a basic idea of who Faust is, on why he is.

Now, this is where Takei really dropped the ball. You have a perfectly Faustian character in Jojo VIII who even has that cursed blood to his name. He’s a man who’s given up his job, his home, the rest of his family, his dream of helping others with his medicine, every aspect of the life he could have had, all because he didn’t want any of it if Eliza wasn’t going to be there.

Faust VIII’s pursuit of necromancy is far nobler than John Faustus’ or even Heinrich Faust’s — he seeks nothing beyond his lost love, going so far as to effectively reject the rest of the world when it can no longer help him in the way he needs.

That rejection, though, doesn’t come to be a difficult choice. No, Johann hardly even chooses it at all. He didn’t need to reject the world, as the world had already rejected him. He’d been dismissed & driven off long before he was truly mad; really, the lack of understanding he received was what flung him into the pit of insanity in the first place.

No one — not his friends, not his family, not even Eliza’s family, certainly not strangers showing up & hearing the story of the devil boy who grew up into a full-fledged demon — no one could even begin to understand his grief. When Eliza died, Faust didn’t just lose the love of his life — he lost everything she represented, all the work that he’d put into saving her, his only friend, his only purpose in life, his only reason for living.

But Johann doesn’t kill himself, & that’s why I have such a problem with Takei’s end for him in the manga. If he were able to resign himself so easily to his death because it meant he could be with Eliza in the afterlife, we never would have even met him in the first place. He would have just killed himself long before the story that is Shaman King even began. It wouldn’t be worth mentioning (not because it wouldn’t have mattered in the world, but because it never would have been relevant to the story).

Johann is no ordinary man, though. He’s motherfucking Faust VIII & he won’t take any of this you-can’t-bring-back-the-dead bullshit. & even if he hadn’t gotten all the way to fully reviving Eliza on his own, no one can deny that he had his shit together for fighting in the Shaman Fight. Not only did he master the particular form of necromancy seen in his original battle style, the guy fucking knew how to strategize. He knows his own abilities & crafted his strategy to blow his strengths out of proportion while at the same time minimizing his weaknesses (so much so that Eliza’s state of not-being turns into his Achilles’ heel).

He knows he’s not the biggest strongest dude just as well as he knows that Eliza couldn’t take Amidamaru in a fist-fight. How would he not? Who spent his whole childhood as the scrawny little doctor’s boy whose only friends were his books & the sick girl who could hardly even leave her house? Faust knows that using brute force doesn’t always work out the best for him, so it’s not surprising that he avoids it, & it’s not surprising that he knows how to dodge it so skillfully.

Faust has the brains to strategize himself out of anything, he has the skills to clean up whatever mess he’s made along the way, & he’s got the madness required to do all the damn fool shit he does.

& he is an idiot — a mad, brilliant one, but still an idiot. They all are.

At first he seems like a really fucking bad guy. He uses Manta to get to Yoh, totally disregarding him as anything other than a tool. But at that point, that reaction is totally in character. Faust has been wandering the world on his own for ten years at this point with no one to talk to, & no one would want to talk to him. He’s just a raving nutjob, right? Everyone has disregarded his feelings, so his only remaining interactions with people would be to get information (& those people still look at him sideways & make it perfectly clear that they think he’s a lunatic & don’t want anything to do with him)! Of course Manta’s just a tool to him, an instrument that, if he calculates the situation correctly, he can use to win the fight in order to advance so he can keep winning & eventually become the King. It’s a perfectly systematic approach that he’s only able to take because to him at that point all people are either tools or obstacles.

Thing is, he never actually stopped being a human being himself — he just didn’t get to act like one or seem like one to anyone else.  & then Anna kinda just up & drags him into Yoh’s team, disregarding his inhumane actions.  This is completely new to him.  Sure, she obviously has ulterior motives, but what she’s offering him is more than an equal exchange for anything he could ever do for her & Yoh.  The others don’t want him to join them, & they’re not quiet about it right in front of his face.  He doesn’t even react to that.  Why?  Because he’s used to it.  He’s used to getting treated like some vile thing that everyone’s keen to get rid of.  But guess what.  Anna gets Yoh to let him join, & even if it’s way twisted, that was the first time anyone stood up for him since Eliza’s death.

& maybe this is just me having my head in the RP-clouds for too long, but I think that when Faust looks at Yoh & Anna — really looks at them & sees them as people (which he’s only able to do once everyone else starts treating him like a person) — he sees a version of himself & Eliza that he hasn’t seen anywhere else, & that makes it easier for him to understand them as human beings, rather than as tools or obstacles or other things that can’t feel.

&, goddamnit, it’s probably better expressed in the anime than in the manga (& if you came to the livestream last night you’ll know what I’m talking about).  Manta obviously hasn’t forgiven him for what happened in the prelims, & Faust doesn’t really expect him ever to do so.  Manta sort of gets used to having Faust around, but only by acting like he’s not a person.  & Faust just goes with it because obviously that’s the only way Manta & most other people can feel even somewhat comfortable around him.  Yoh tells Manta that Faust’s not the same as he was before, but Manta still expects the worst out of him, & Faust just kinda stands there & acts like it doesn’t bother him.  Here, here he’s resigning himself to the cards dealt to him, because he doesn’t want to hurt Manta or anyone else again.  Even if they can’t understand him, he does the best he can to show them compassion.  That means putting up a wall — a prison, even — around himself, just so that the others— whom he legitimately cares about — can feel safe with him even existing.

Faust has a heart & it’s really made of gold, it’s just that it gets hard to see when no one else will acknowledge the fact that he even has one.

AAAAAAAAAAAH BABYYYYYYYYYY ;_________________________;


Second of the three commissions I have! For this, I had to come up with the mechanical arm and legs for the guy.  

Commissioned by Jack (two of his characters), who is also very happy with the result!! ;WWWWWWWWWW; THANK YOU!!

Commissions are still open!

C, L, O, P, Q, T, U, W, Y
- dangerousthisjackofhearts

C: Who is your favorite character of your own?  Who is your favorite character created by somebody else?  Why?

It’d be a tie between the main character and the first witch (won’t reveal names cause I dun wanna). The first has a very nice development and I’ve grown very fond of him and I want to see him happy — I REALLY DO REALLY OMFG —, and as for the second, I’ve always liked her whimsical nature, her abilities, and her cliffhanger. They’re just both brave and funny and adorable in their own different ways.

L: What advice would you give to other writers?

Lots of people just say ‘READ’. I agree, but not just ‘read lots of other books’, but read tv shows, read advices and comments, read your friends’ writings too, anything you can do to APPLY AND LEARN. Don’t even stop looking for improvement, or for mistakes so you get the upper hand on yourself. That’s the key to get better.

O: What motivates you to write?

Those stories are meant to be told. Or more than that, they’re meant to be heard, to be read, to be out there for others. If I’m blessed with the basic idea of how to write, it’s my duty to deliver those wonderful stories into words so other people can enjoy them the same way I do.

P: What are your goals for things to happen to your writing? (Getting published, getting a good review, having a fandom, etc)

I’d like to know what having a fandom feels like, yeah ;w; Of course I want to get published — it feels great to have your name out there and to actually know that random people you might never meet will get to read what you wrote! But… most of all, I… really would like to write someone’s favorite story… It’d make my life.

Q: How do you get through writer’s block?

W-writing anyway o___o I must be so weird, but I know we can’t get out of a block by just letting it be. I just keep hammering at it until something half-way decent comes along. There’s good days and bad days to art, of course, but that doesn’t mean that if you can’t do it one day, you’re blocked. You just have to keep writing and keep at it until that wall is crushed, because that wall is yourself: tiredness stress expectations demands time lack of inspiration uuuuuuugh Just lots of shit that block your way, but the way isn’t cut, so unless you start taking that shit out or try your find your way over it, you’re gonna get stuck there and no one will take you out.

T: What’s your favorite part of the writing process?  Why?

THE PLANNING SKDJFHSLKDFJKSLFD everything’s raw and new and exciting and you get to see everything grow or fit together.

U: What’s your least favorite part of the writing process?  Why?

Cross-references. You make your research, you make up the world and setting, but then, oh, something sticks out. And then you try to look up some more info about it and WHOA SOMETHING THAT WASN’T THERE IS NOW THERE BEFORE AND IT CONTRADICTS WHAT YOU HAD. eg Dragons spit fire but NOPE DRAGONS ALSO SPIT ACID or some shit. Second-guessing yourself forever, unless you find a real good reason for shit to be like it is. Otherwise, you’re doomed to eternal arrangements and rinse and repeat.

W: What’s your biggest pet peeve in writing?

MISPELLING SKJDFHSJKDF POOR ORTOGRAPHY or gramatical errors put me down so fucking much I don’t care the story’s fucking gold one typo and you’re descredited

DUDE IT’S A VITAL PART OF WRITING TO CARE ABOUT AND CONSERVE AND WORK ON THE LANGUAGE YOU’RE WRITING IN. Time-capsule speeches apart, writing is merely a choice in the order of words, so if you can’t respect those words, then mah man you gotta go another way.

Y: How would you describe the perfect prose?  How would you describe your own prose? 

p-perfect wat um there’s no perfect anything this is another discussion entirely

but my own prose? Uh… I have a few quirks, like, after all the scriptwriting training I’ve had, I find particularly enjoyable to write things and not just as feelings but as how things look and actually happen — the subtle language of gestures or landscapes makes the mind work in another sense, forcing the reader to interpret things instead of just getting told X character is feeling down and something omnious is coming. Also, I really dig messing internal questionings and reflections into the narration, BUT THAT’S JUST A VERY ODD QUIRK AND IDK IF IT’S LEGAL I JUST DO IT.

It’s time for another huge rambling with Hunt V:

dangerousthisjackofhearts asked you:


:V HI  oh god this is so late


Mikihisa is… the only parent to have any real involvement in the story, plot-wise (En Tao is also there-there, but not enough). Mikihisa was the first and last parent to ever do something for the kids (not his kids, the kids), and his efforts were, even though hidden and clouded during half the story, and afterwards kind of annoying, important to their development and battle growth.

But. Does he do the parenting role he’s supposed to do…? We all know families in Shaman King are always terribly fucked up, that’s a given. So when Yoh’s family started showing up, we all knew they weren’t going to be good news. Yet, as much as I hate the guy, I think he’s the only parent who actually tries to do something, even if awfully misguided, and very much dismissed by his own son (s).

[I’m going to use a read more because frankly 4 WORD PAGES ALRIGHT? alright]

Read More

[um trigger warning? just in case]

"………Hello.  I hope you don’t mind me interrupting.  I just wondered if you might consider coming to Hölle and make me some company.  I promise it will be delightful.”

April 8th, Johann Faust VIII’s birthday!! BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, MAN. I REALLY DO. And this is my… tribute! (?)


The broken finger and burned wrists come from the RP I’m in. SO HAI, CREEPYASFUCK RP-BASED FAUST. WANNA KILL YOUR ROLEPLAYER? I THINK SO.




fictional works from all over the world are filled with men desperately obessed with their dead wife/lover/love interest and in most cases, even trying to bring them back from the dead

it’s something that goes back to orpheus’ myth - for the west - and also izanami and izanagi’s story - for the east - and i guess this means it’s a stereotype that’s deeply ingrained in mankind’s subconscious

it can usually be read as an attachment to the ‘image’ of a beloved woman, as selfish love that can only be fulfilled by ‘having’ that person and also the inability to free oneself from the baser/more materialistic aspects of life and love and learn to love selflessly

in myths, it usually ends with these men being punished by women, representing the fact that they had let themselves become enslaved to them—though it’s not meant to blame the women, but the men’s weakness

… i think this applies to kinzo too, i’ve sometimes thought that he reminds of orpheus a lot (though orpheus’ story is often idolized for being romantic)

what’s the point of this post? idk i was reading chrno crusade and there was another character like that

freaking Faust VIII is the embodiment of this theme, as well. 

besides having its own mixture with Faust and Mephistopheles’ stories, Faust VIII made his life to revolve around someone who was already dying before they met. trying to save someone that was sure to die because of feelings already show that there was a previous desperation towards the life that he had as a child and life itself; he saw no meaning to it, and tried to find one through the denial of a certain death sentence. it’s like he doomed himself from the very beggining. and then he cured her and they were happy and she still got murdered — her destiny was unyielding, she was going to die one way or another, and she was going to get stripped out of his hands. 

no one can say he didn’t see it coming. he knew — he didn’t want to accept it, but he knew. and even after she passed, the same denial persisted, masking it with “unfairness”. he convinced himself she was free of the curse of death after the illness was gone, and that should’ve made every evil go away, and getting killed even after that conquer was “unfair”. silly Faust, you cannot conquer death. 

falling into madness, pursuing necromancy, all driven by that same denial: the need of having her, even if only her body, meanwhile he got her soul and life back as well. the need for the knowledge of death to reverse it at will. the need of defeating and conquering death. 

why would you bind yourself to someone with the shadow of death upon them and deny it to such extremes? why would you force yourself to find meaning to your existence by willingly binding you to go against the one certainty there exists about life; that it ends?

just like the quest for the search of paradise, it will always end badly. the spirit will turn into a demon, will be absorbed by hatred, will be hurt and hurting throughout every second of the new life that was granted, will be cursed to a never-ending tail chase, will bring the man down with herself, will be cast into the deepest pit of hell, will disappear forever.

& that denial of his is expressly horrible because he’s barely standing on the brink of it.  Of course he knows that in the end, it’s impossible to master, conquer, tame, defeat death.  It can’t be done.  That’s been proven time & time again.  He’s a doctor.  Of course he knows better.  He always knew.  & he won’t ever forget.

I only ever wanted to save you, & can’t you see where that’s gotten me?  You were taken from me — it was inevitable.  But I thought that if I could delay it, we could escape together…  But no.  Your name was marked by Death long ago & He wanted to toy with me, Doctor Faust, string me along with promises of happiness — & do you see what I got?  You were always meant to be taken, but it was better for Him to exact his revenge upon my family once again, that incurable sword in my side, mein Gott!  He stood back & let me save you the first time, knowing the day would come where I would return home & find my life crushed beneath His unforgiving heel.

&, yes, yes, it did rub off on Yoh, it got to him, somehow worked its way into his sweet little head that he, too, can hold it off.  That’s something that’s struck me as… almost painfully, cruelly funny for a long time now.  Because when the two of them first met, what did Yoh say to Faust?

I don’t think it’s the answer.  Everyone dies, eventually.  That’s what makes life precious.  If you conquer death, will life still have value?  Faust… you live too much in the past.

Ah, but then who went & chased Faust down into Hell?  Yoh did, of course.  He wasn’t going to let him die if he could have any say in it, even if Faust’s death was perfectly natural (though attributable  to his extraordinarily unhealthy lifestyle).  Faust & Yoh aren’t the same person, though; that obsessive drive is only a necessity to Faust.

why would you force yourself to find meaning to your existence by willingly binding you to go against the one certainty there exists about life; that it ends?

Maybe there’s no other drive strong enough to sustain him.  That endless, pointless battle is all that he has.  His character is too perfectly tragic.  It doesn’t even matter that he’s doomed to fail.  It doesn’t matter because that failure only truly manifests itself once he’s already dead & gone himself.  In the between, he’s fighting for something.  It keeps him going.  That’s the only justification for it.  That fight against death?  It’s the final frontier, the unsolved challenge, unbeatable…  Of course a Faust wouldn’t be able to resist it.


So classy and stuff at the tea party of awesome detectives with their pokemon fuckyes.



 #she is pure evil

(refering to me)

Yep, kehehehehehehehe~ although this was supposed to be sweet xDDDD??!